Year: 2022

Today, I was in downtown LA with a friend I haven’t seen in two years.

We went to a ramen restaurant called “Rakkan” and Angel City Brewery for beer.

It’s Sunday afternoon.

Beer and ramen are the best.

For some reason, we got into a conversation about sexual desire today.

Both he and I have a high sex drive.

We used to have a lot of fun and were always chasing girls.

He is an American, but he visits Japan often.

We enjoyed various nightlife activities until he had a wife.

I loved girls and was always looking for someone.

I used to feel like I wasn’t alive if I didn’t have sex.

Lately, I don’t have a girlfriend, so it’s been a while.

I have stopped masturbation and watching pornographic videos. So I have started to stay away from that kind of thing.

When I was far from my sexual desire, I realized that I was always looking for a woman, so I began to wonder if this was some kind of strong dependence.

There is a word in America called Blue Balls, which I learned from him today, and it means “to be horny from women but they cannot come”.

It sounds in hell that It means the pain that comes from doing something that makes you horny but you cannot produce sperm.

Stopping such horny behavior will decrease sexual performance. No need to use your　penis, so then it will be a natural result. And that will be very scary for all guys.

But it may be necessary for boys who are always thirsty in search of girls.

Masturbation itself may be an ancient practice.

It may have been around since ancient times, but I thought, “Animals are also left to nature, and should be left to nature.”

For men with strong sexual desires, not trying to be erotic is a very good way to focus on oneself.

In fact, I felt that my recent behavior had improved because I had stopped masturbation and started living.

I thought that masturbation is not biologically necessary and that it is always good for health to masturbate twice a week, but in the end, when it comes out, it comes out on its own, or it is absorbed by the body, or it depends on the person’s own way of thinking.

I would like to refer you to other articles on the subject of rising testosterone and medical science, but I think it is up to the individual to decide.

But I felt two things.

First, I can focus on my own growth.

Eroticism is something that gets in the way.

If you only think about girls, you can’t really improve yourself.

Self-development is about exploring what you love.

Enhancing it is about reducing your various desires and focusing on your inner feelings.

I think it is to concentrate on one’s inner feelings.

By the way, eroticism always comes from the outside.

I think it is mostly from sight.

I haven’t tried it, but if you were a man alone on a desert island for ten years, you wouldn’t be in erotic mode.

Secondly,

I can know what kind of things are important to me.

Love too much and eroticism are blind.

Men, in no small part, will have expectations when they go on a first date with a cute woman, for example.

Of course, some may not be interested in erotic acts at all.

But for those who are interested, eroticism starts to get in the way of seeing her true nature and her good and bad qualities.

This is the best thing to realize.

Because if you rewrite a girl’s goodness into eroticism, you will repeat the same thing again and you will only judge a person’s goodness by her eroticism (appearance).

In our modern society, where desires always surround us. No one will tell you if it is good enough.

We don’t get enough our information from the Internet.

Eventually, we need to do and learn for ourselves.

I thought that we need to control our desires better.

All desires, whether they be food, sleep, or sex, can be problematic if too much is taken.

It’s not just about the amount.

But we also need to pay attention to how we take it.

However, My friend’s friend is having a lot of fun in Japan. He has been having physical relations with models and porn stars at a very fast pace.

I was honestly envious when I heard that.

But in my case, I don’t envy them anymore now because I unwired eroticism to transform. Honestly, maybe a bit but If I refuse to watch their flashy YouTube videos, I don’t have any information to compare.

I didn’t have to think about how much better they are than others.

And I also compare myself to the rich people I see on social media, and I feel unhappy when I obsess over things I don’t have.

It is up to each person to decide what makes them truly happy.

I would like to be more in control of my desires and to know what I really want from within.

Then I have stopped thinking that everything I see or hear is information I need.

I don’t want to be excited by external factors. I want to know what I want from within.

And I have to ask myself, “What is the point of continuing to seek it out?” Is it really a good thing or not?

I would like to continue this research, not easy, but never ending.

Thank you for reading.

To relate an article: [Mental Heal] do you know how to deal with Greed

The sky is cloudy.

Or rather, the sky is smoky because the mountains are burning too much.

I had no idea that the sky color would change so much when the mountains burned.

On days like this,

It is hard to get excited.

However, I realized that when the weather is not so good, I am helped a lot by the wonderful weather in California.

It is nice to have nice weather after all.

The environment in which you live is very important for survival.

Live in a place you like which is better for your health.

But sometimes it is not easy to live here, even if you want to live where you live now, because of money reasons such as rent, family problems, or visa problems if you are from another country.

In fact, I have recently been thinking that being in a place you love can be a battle against so many hardships.

Love, work, the house you live in, whatever that when you love something or someone, you will suffer more than when you don’t love it.

We suffer from the attachment that we cannot give up.

But that’s just because you’re not living in the moment.

When you want to let go of attachment, bring your thoughts back to the present.

You know, just the weather was overcast and I was feeling a little down, then fear would come in my mind.

For me, when I looked back on my day, I found myself feeling anxious about the future, vague about what I wanted to be, perhaps because of my attachment to what I wanted to be, and my thoughts were going to and from.

My thoughts were going this way and that way, and I was not able to focus on the present.

So, I thought about coming back to the here and now.

We don’t know what will happen in the future.

Wildfires could come up here and burn my house to the ground.

I might not be able to live here tomorrow, in the town I love.

Or I may suddenly lose everything.

If I spend all my time worrying about such uncertainties, I will not be able to enjoy the present.

When I am stuck on it then, I always chant to my brain, “Focus on now, now, now.”

In fact, even death feels unimportant when I live in the present.

I am anxious about death, I am anxious that the people I love will hate me, I am anxious about losing my place to live, I am anxious about failure in the future, I am anxious about losing money, etc.

Having attachments causes a lot of anxiety to run through our brains.

We can’t eliminate all of them.

But to think that “Now, now, now!” is a good idea.

In Zen, there is a term called 放下著 (hougejaku), which means to let go of attachment.

It tells us that if we let go, we can use our energy for other things.

But you may not know how to let go.

After a heartbreak, it is not so easy to forget someone you love or to let go of an attachment.

My own ideas on how to let go are that I believe that living simply in the present moment is the best way to let go of attachments and to enjoy life.

The important thing is to bring your thoughts to the present and focus on them.

Yesterday and tomorrow are not very important.

To think about how to live now,

Eventually, all of fear really doesn’t matter.

It’s more about living in the now.

I think it is much more important to live in the present than to chase too much after the past or future ideal self.

When I eat dinner with a friend while thinking about something, I don’t enjoy it at all.

Even if it is the last time I have dinner with them.

If you are feeling uneasy about meeting someone of the opposite sex in a casual coffee shop, you will miss the chance to have an enjoyable conversation with them. Or your life will end without even noticing the person.

The scenery changes when you live in the present.

You see the same place and people differently every day.

This awareness is the key to Cherish each and every single moment.

I believe that we can enrich our lives by making the most of the energy we have in the present moment.

I believe that this awareness will enrich our lives.

Thank you for reading.

To relate some article: [Mental Heal] do you know how to deal with Greed

I borrowed a new book from the library today and I feel good about it.

It is a book by author Steve Herz.

I read the beginning of the book right away and am looking forward to reading it all the way through.

I’m getting all kinds of wisdom and I also get a sense of fulfillment from it.

Reading books is really good for the body and mind.

It is similar to muscle training.

However, It’s only recently that I started reading books in earnest.

I think it is hard to find something that enriches your life. Because we are all hard in our life and it is pretty much not easy to keep in your good mind.

I have tried various hobbies in the past such as calligraphy, photography, and instruments.

But the best way to manage yourself is to keep a healthy mind. To control by your health with Workout and reading books are definitely two hobbies that you should try.  

Because they can be done by yourself, no matter where you are.

It is also cost-effective.

I buy or borrow books, but if I go to the library, it’s free.

The changes in me since I started these two things are that I’m getting a little bit bigger, and I like myself a little bit more than before.

It may sound weird, but just looking in the mirror in the morning allows me to enjoy the start of the day with my personal growth.

I used to wake up every morning and feel tired.

But since I started muscle training has helped me to get rid of this feeling.

There are many ways to improve one’s self-esteem, whether it be through study, work, or love.

But they are invisible, and in some cases, they can bring your feelings down.

Muscle training is great because you can see it, you can do it on your own, and it just goes up. No matter how you are ugly, stupid, and low self-esteem that you have it now.

I have also started to pay more attention to my diet, so my body is in better shape.

The other thing is Reading.

When I read a book which means that I’m learning English at the same time\.

At that point, it’s the best hobby I’ve ever had.

I never intended to make reading a regular part of my daily routine, but for some reason I just want to read.

It’s because it’s a book about something I’m interested in. So, reading with my favorite coffee is the most luxurious time for me.

But by incorporating a little bit of this kind of “luxurious time” into my day, I am able to enjoy my days.

I enjoy every day more.

It’s very simple, but….

You should do what you want to do, even if you don’t have time to do it all day.

It is a waste if you don’t try to enjoy your life.

And it is like knowledge of how your brain grows and a new way of life.

Yes, happiness will come from self-discipline.

It’s just another way to go up your life level.

And, It never goes down. All that is going to increase your wisdom and your confidence.

It is especially good to read books that you like.

Any book, manga, mystery novel, or whatever you enjoy is fine.

Actually, I don’t read books I don’t like in my free time and I like to live with the bare minimum of what I don’t like to do.

However, I think just doing a little bit of what I like to do in the time I have available is fine.

Before I wasn’t reading, I had nothing to do.

I think I spent a lot of time watching Facebook, Instagram, porn, etc.

Then I’d be like… I’m a little bit feel like I’m an loser.

Before my mentality, on the contrary, was not that strong. I would think to myself, “I’m losing right now” and I would lower my own tension.

Then, every time I did that, I would lose sight of myself in the present.

I live in the past or the future.

Then you can’t enjoy the present.

But that’s what reading has changed for me to enjoy at the moment.

Well, If you cannot focus you cannot read so,,.

If you are like me, and you feel anxious or attached to something that you can’t do anything about by yourself and meditation or exercise alone won’t help you think about it again, then reading is good for you.

Reading is good for those people who are unable to fill the gaps in their minds with knowledge.

By introducing a new way of looking at things, you can. You will be able to move forward.

I believe that reading is a way to nurture the ability to take action rather than anxiety.

Well, even at my adult age, I learned a lot from my favorite manga, It’s called “Space Brothers.”

https://www.amazon.com/Space-Brothers/dp/B07JKGWJ6Yby Amazon shopping

If you change the way you look at things, you will feel more hopeful that you can do it.

That was actually the case.

The way to love yourself is to train your muscles and read books.

It gives you a sense of fulfillment and It also exercises your brain and body.

I realized that “enjoying my growth” is the most important thing in life.

However, I had a hard time realizing to love yourself.

Of course, love, work, and friendship are important. But to look at yourself is the most important thing in life.

You know you will be alone when you pass so many years later, and You need to enjoy yourself as a strong man with what you like to do.

And enjoy the growth, even if it is a little bit at a time.

I did not understand such a simple thing before.

What inspired me to enjoy my personal growth was muscle training and reading books.

From now on I am going to enjoy my growth by myself. It is not for others.

Thank you for reading.

To relate an article: Dumped Men Hurts? How to Overcome a Painful Heartbreak

Lately, I have been letting anxiety get the best of me, and I have not been able to live in the moment.

In addition, It is difficult to know myself in a state of anxiety. And, In this season of winter, I also feel lonely and strongly wish for wish fulfillment.

However, when wishes come true it is usually when I do not think about such things and just act positively.

However, when wishes come true it is usually when I do not think about such things and just act positively.

At first, I would like to introduce you a book.

I have some recommendations for all men to read. It is called “I USED TO BE A MISERABLE F*CK” by John Kim.

If you are a man, you have fun reading this book. It’s a book that talks about changing from a boy to become a man through his own experiences.

For men, just getting older does not change the fundamentals.

Some people are like children at any age.

However, I believe that one day we have to change our way of thinking.

If we as men want to leave offspring, we cannot remain in the mindset of children in order to protect our partners.

It does not mean that we have to lose our playful mindset. But there will always be a time when we have to become so-called men.

Because a women need a real Men, and it need to change for their own sake and for their partners.

And Actually the women need to accept that. Some women are not ready yet for that too.

The time to change is when you know yourself.

It is at a certain point that a man must realize his own weakness. And to change into a real man, he must accept his weakness anyway and have a mindset of not caring.

You must stop caring about everything, no matter how dangerous or unpleasant the situation.

For example, boys care about everything, even if it is a small thing.

Are you trying to care about your fashion sense to those around you? Or hairstyles, how much money you have, and what you like to do.

Are you acting according to others, neglecting the choices you have to make for yourself?

When a boy turns into a man. You need to think about who you are as a person.

What are your favorite foods?

You need to be clear about what you like to eat and what you want to do in life.

When you realize the best of you, You can change at any time.

After all, living a life in your own way is probably the simplest and easiest way to express yourself.

So, That’s why I wear a blue bucket that most people wouldn’t wear and my favorite strong-smelling perfume to go out for a beer and talk to people, not just women.

I believe that expressing yourself is the only way to change from a boy to a man.

You can wear what you like, even if you think it’s strange.

Eat the food you want to eat.

Go where you want to go.

I think this is what men need to do nowadays.

I would like to share my thoughts with all the men who are being misled by women.

Someone whose Life is not fun, keep it simple. And do what you want to do without worrying about what others think.

I’m sure you’ll find that by doing what you want to do when you want to do it.

And you’ll be able to do what you couldn’t do before because you were too worried about other people (girlfriends, family, friends, people at work, etc.).

You will definitely be able to change.

So I thought, “Heal yourself today.” And “Live in the moment.”

Thank you for reading.

To relate an article: Better comes to don’t live of the social value

I have been thinking deeply about greed lately.

Sexual desire, desire to sleep, and appetite are truly indispensable desires.

But at the same time, I think they also have a magical element that can destroy us if we have too many of them.

If we could control our desires, wouldn’t life be easier? I think the answer is Yes.

I was thinking all the time that if we could control our greed, it would make our lives easier or something more to become a richer life.

There is a psychology that Freud solves, that personality is formed by sexual desire, and it is indeed sexual desire and a very great desire.

It is not the only reason why men do all the things they do. But they have them in order to make women feel good about themselves.

The ordained Buddhists and Christian gurus are very stoic in their sexual behavior. But it is necessary for everyone?

I have decided to aim for something in the middle.

Because religion and teachings are wonderful, and there are many elements to take in, and I always learn from them.

But I have recently realized, as I have been transcribing my thoughts and outputting them in this way on my blog. That I have been thinking of all the external information elements from religious or someone’s opinion from internets are not a match for me.

I mean that something is still don’t know all me myself with my potential. That is why all the external information elements doesn’t match for me. And It is not maybe for every single people too.

For example,

I have read a lot of information on the Internet that says;

• If you do this, you will gain muscle.
• When you do this then you will be popular.
• If you work hard more and more, you will get more money.
• When you do this, you will be happy.

Thankfully, it has become very easy for me to receive knowledge that I didn’t even know existed.

But on the other hand, it can also lead you astray.

I don’t really know if the information is right for me or not.

If you want to know it, then You have to actually try it out.

Eventually, you have to make changes and rethink things in your own way with it.

It is very low-risk to try to follow someone else and imitate them.

But it is not 100% correct in the end.

No matter what the great man teaches, there are certain things that you have to do.

“You have to actually do this.” or “If you do it this way, it will work.” There is no such thing in this world.

It is all up to you to make your own choices and that is the most important thing.

And as a result, to be in the middle.

Not too much, but not enough.

But not enough is not fun either.

Too much love is too heavy for the other person, too little love is too boring for the other person.

If you have too much sexual desire, you will commit a crime, and if you have too little, you will become a man who cannot express his love.

Too little or too much appetite is detrimental to health.

If you have too much for sleep, your body will go crazy, and if you don’t sleep, your head will go crazy.

Think of it this way, I thought, “Ah, the middle is good.”

I’ve come to the conclusion that it’s all about balance.

Balance is very important. not for everyone but most of all people will keep balance is good.

The best position for me is in the middle.

It is neither right-leaning or left-leaning.

This is just my story, and it may not apply to everyone.

I am a person who moves like an animal, developing my own sensibility and controlling greed with human reason.

By doing so I am excited every day.

Since I learned that, I like myself more. I feel better than ever.

Buddha said that life is nothing but suffering.

If you are full of greed, it is suffering.

If you have no greed, life is suffering.

It is comfortable to be right in the middle of what you want.

You only live once.

Let’s enjoy every moment of it.

Thank you for reading.

To relate an article: How to understand you, do you know possibility?

It’s been a while since I watched The Matrix.

It’s an old movie but I really like it.

The images are very beautiful and the story is very exciting.

I do believe that most people watch this movie but If you have not seen this movie, I definitely recommend it.

The world we live in is a world where maybe the world we live in is not real or realistic at all, but something created by someone else. That was a great conception of the movie.

I thought that It may be something that is created by someone else in our world too. There is something about psychology and brain function that interests me.

So something that I felt through this film.

The scenes we see in our daily life, such as the smell of a flower, the sound of a river, the warmth of a human touch. From these things, we can feel fear, anxiety, joy, and excitement.

The brain interprets all these things as good or bad, and makes us feel them.

I realized that if my brain is fatigued, the wonderful scenery and music I am seeing now will not look so beautiful, nor will I perceive it as good music.

Sometimes I feel tired.

I have so much to do, but suddenly I feel unmotivated.

I wish I could just quit. But in most situations, it is not so easy to just quite. I think it is the same for everyone.

Work and school come even if you don’t want them to.

Childcare, daily chores, and the daily routine that you have set for yourself.

All of these things have to be completed in a day, and they go on day after day.

If you want to adapt to society, you can’t just stay in the mountains for the rest of your life.

However, for most of people that you can’t just stay in the mountains for the rest of your life.

So, what should we do?

It’s all about giving your brain a break, even if it’s just for an hour or a half hour.

It is to give your brain a rest.

You can train your brain by resting it after you use it.

Make a strategy to make a task you don’t like fun.

We cannot control what happens around us.

So, if we first train our brain to give it a break and give it good instructions.

You will feel everything in your own good direction.

We believe that the brain, organs, and muscles can all be trained.

If any part of the body is overused, it must be rested or it will break down.

Just as we all have different values.

Some people are moved by the beauty and strength of a flower just by looking at it, while others are not moved by the beauty and strength of a flower just by looking at it.

Others feel that it is just a sad creature that will soon wither and die.

I don’t think we need to be optimistic about everything. But we can at least try to make ourselves suffer so much that our brains.

If your brain is so fatigued that you have to stop working. And it would be better to sleep or meditate to rest your brain first, and then proceed.

Also, if you feel tired and unmotivated, it is effective to go outside.

How much rest is enough depends on the person. But in my case, just thinking about what I am thinking about in my life. And updating my blog like this is usually enough to relieve my fatigue.

I don’t think about the structure of the content.

I just write what I want to write naturally. It is because I am able to be so natural in my life and enjoy every day.

With these activities, I am able to train my brain, body, my senses, and my mind.

Once again to say, I am able to enjoy every day of my life.

I believe that living slowly and at my own pace

life will be richer.

Like in the Matrix. I will be able to live my life at my own pace, even when things happen that are far beyond my imagination.

I will be me, and I will be able to do things and make things happen.

And to believe that many things are possible and achievable.

Believing in myself is the most important thing.

I am glad that I was able to see a movie I saw a long time ago from a different perspective.

Thank you for reading.

To read an article which related to: [Mental Health] How to Overcome Your Worries 

This time of year is always so hectic that it’s hard to relax. Because I find myself a little frustrated.

I know that I am not the only one who is frustrated and I have come to think that it is not only me. And I feel that everyone’s mood is a little different from before.

Since the restrictions on various things caused by the coronavirus, or lately people worry about recession.

I think that the economic change has affected people’s moods.

For example, the mood of the people who would have been able to keep their shops open without the coronavirus.

Some people would have been able to keep their stores open if not for the coronavirus.

Now, some people who can’t go to work anymore. We don’t go out to eat with friends as much anymore.

We can no longer do the things I used to be able to do because our situation is always changing somehow.

This is very stressful.

Actually, I broke my leg a few years ago. I was very cautious of others, irritated with myself.

It was a very difficult time for me.

Speaking of inconvenient and difficult times, recently I feel that I have developed a distance from people.

Because I had to get away from people at a distance of 6feet.

At the time, I greeted my neighbors much less frequently each time I passed them.

With my mask and sunglasses (glasses) on, I can’t see their smiles or their physiognomy.

I am a worrier who asks how they are doing before I speak to them.

It is more difficult than before to initiate communication.

I think it has already become difficult to recognize who the other person is.

We tend to remember people by sight.

People with glasses and masks, I myself wear sunglasses and a mask. So, they frequently don’t even recognize me.

And I feel that the distance between us is gradually growing, like a wall.

What I am trying to say is I really think that I am a very social animal.

I have found myself in need of relationships with people because of these small differences.

When I was a child, my parents told me that I had always been very shy.

I think it was around junior high school and high school that I became more sociable, as if I had changed.

But this Corona experience showed me that my roots have not changed.

I travel, eat, and do everything alone.

I know that my time is very important.

Frankly, it is a very enjoyable time.

And I don’t want to belong to a society that forces me to be in sync with others.

That doesn’t mean I don’t want to be with anyone.

I don’t want to pretend to be someone I’m not.

I just want to be one person who is real.

I think everyone has the desire to be needed or wanted by someone. But some people, like me, have a hard time trusting others.

A long-time friend of mine told me that when we get deep into a relationship, he can see 20% or so of a dark side to me.

He said that he couldn’t talk about it to me. Because he thought maybe it was about not wanting to be touched for me and He knew it was my habit of disliking and distrusting people who forced me to break that boundary.

I thought it came out and made it difficult for me to relate well to people.

That may sound like a shortcoming, but it is a part of who I am and I can’t throw it away.

However, I have come to realize that even if I try to force myself to trust people by pretending to be someone I am not, my tension won’t last, and in any case, in the end, I will be hazy.

In the past, I used to hide it and treat everyone cheerfully, responding to everyone in all directions.

But recently, I can’t do it in this pandemic and totally different circumstances, or I don’t have the energy to do it, or the other person doesn’t react well.

I sometimes felt that I was not cheerful, that I was not like myself.

But wait. I realized that I used to feel that I was not very active in talking, and that it was too much trouble to talk to my classmates during breaks at school.

I was the kind of weirdo who would sleep alone in the bathroom sink during school breaks because I didn’t want to talk to my classmates.

When I was in London for my internship.

He was always out of the group and wandered around by himself.

I used to annoy the teachers. So I wondered where my sociability had come from until a couple of years ago.

It came from the people around me who trusted me. The people around me who were making me feel open that way were the ones who were making me feel that way.

I realized that I was being sociable because of the people around me who made me feel that way, and because they did the same.

It was not that I was social, but that I and the people around me were relaxed.

Now, there is not enough room for everyone due to many things.

So the strange distance between us is understandable.

Things don’t go well with the people around us.

I don’t feel good about a lot of things.

You don’t have to think that it is because you have changed and are in a very low mood and force yourself to be nice.

You can live your life without forcing yourself to be nice, without forcing yourself to be a good person, without forcing yourself to be a good person on all sides.

I have decided that this is normal. And to stop thinking that there is something wrong with me, that I am wrong. And that eliminating the idea that there is something wrong with me or that it is my fault is the only way.

I am sure that to not pretend it will make my life richer and simpler.

Thank you for reading.

To read an article which related to: Better comes to don’t live of the social value

Having a good coffee at the usual Starbucks will soothe me.

Earlier today. I was suddenly thinking about possibilities. I actually just like this word. We all need some possibility in our life.

Possibility is a state where you are not sure if things are able to do it, but they are probable. I have been able to accomplish many seemingly impossible things. That I have experienced since I was a kid many years ago.

I have made it this far because I have believed in that possibility.

It was my belief in my own potential that led me to leave my hometown.

After I graduate a special school, I moved to live in Tokyo for work when I was 20 years old.

When I left Japan for the U.S., I also wanted to believe in my new possibilities. I enjoyed my time in Tokyo, but I always wondered if there was something more I could do. I always looking for something new with my interests.

But sometimes or somedays, It could find something insides of me. That I didn’t realize it before I came to the U.S. What that is that? I think about the possibility at first, I always get scared to do it. Suddenly, gets anxiety to try new things. I wish I could believe in myself easily, but it can not be sometimes. Because I noticed my problem on my mind.

I wanted to pursue where on earth this came from and what it is. If we don’t solve the problem, we will continue to live in fear of something. I wanted to avoid this.

Nowadays, I am trying to learn a dance such as salsa and bachata.

When I started to learn social dance, at social dance class, I felt fear.

It is “ballroom dancing”, you know what, actually I never see my possibilities with it. My dance is very unsmooth, what the hell beats dancing. I didn’t expect that you should know music at first for the dance.

Ballroom dancing is very difficult for leading ladies, I mean not just that dance. However, besides that, mistakes are usual. It is embarrassing and frustrating.

I wondered if I would ever really be able to dance well. And I became extremely afraid of making mistakes. I noticed that these feelings have been created since I was a kid in Japan.

From my experiences, I tell you this is for sure that., in Japan, you cannot make mistakes.

For example, when you make a mistake in your answer it is not good in class, everyone laughs at you.

It sounds crazy but it is true. If you make a mistake at school, job, or any circumstances, people will blame you for sure. So, I couldn’t make any mistakes in any situation. That was too much pressure every day.

Eventually, I don’t like the education system in Japan for these reasons.

If I express my opinion or do something wrong, people around me get angry or make fun of me.

Once, I tried to have the possibility to have a dream about becoming a soccer player in my childhood.

When I played on a team, I made a mistake. And I gave up on to play on the team. Because I was bullied by my teammates for the reason that I did not play well at games. Very sensitive and fragile in my childhood. I was always behind him my old brother to hide.

After all, I did lose confidence and passion to play soccer. I quit playing completely.

That was a nightmare if only I had believed in my skills and in myself at that time. Things that I would have fought for undaunted.

As a result, I was losing to myself. This is something I still think about even now as an adult, such as trauma. It is a big and they are deep inside of me. I didn’t know how to find it out and resolve.

And every time, I thought that I can’t make a mistake. I say nothing is better to not say any mistaken to people or friends. Even if I had a small things like talking with strangers at a café.

I had a hard time believing in my own potential because of that childhood experience. But I was able to change that, and it started to get better. Because I had a dialogue with myself.

When you can change your mind to recover from your old trauma.

I know it is not easy but there is some possibility.

For example, Let’s go back to your kids’ memories. Maybe you don’t want to remember something but you need to let it go.

Do you remember when you finally learned to ride a bicycle after falling and getting hurt? It is one of making the impossible become the possible which you’ve already did it before. It is not to believe in the impossible at the first place.

But you did to believe yourself in the possible way and keep moving forward.

There are so many things that you did believe in before. That we have challenged ourselves a lot because of it. We must not forget that.

If you have some problem with your past, we must accept these kinds of experiences. The experiences is under the below:

• Parents who don’t tolerate mistakes.
• Friends who use you or mount you.
• The biggest culprit is myself, who created a fear inside of your mind.

That experience is hard. But If you ignore them, it messes up your possibilities again and again. And you are scared of these people who make fun of you with mistakes.

To be honest with you.

My parents are great, but my kids’ experience with bully things was really bad. This has always hindered my potential. And after all, Dancing is really difficult to make it fun while leading with a smile in front of the girls. Because I don’t want people to laugh at me and failed.

My mind is like “I’m afraid”, “how am I not good at it”, “I am pathetic”, and I want to hide myself.

In a relationship, or a work presentation, and at an important game. When the time comes, my heart starts to move fast and my hands start to shake.

As a result, It sucks. So what can we do to eliminate this intention and fear?

This is the only way to think that failure is a possibility.

So let’s fail a lot!

This is the only way to do it. A person feels fear only about 167 milliseconds after seeing or hearing the feared object, and it is transmitted to the brain. Therefore, Avoidance will be difficult. Sorry for that tip.

In actions that would alleviate that deep breathing definitely make you calm. I tried to have a beer before nervousness. But it was a bad idea to make me sleepy and I couldn’t speak well at all. At lease, to try somethings what you can feel well with it.

And you need to know about fear of failure is not a bad thing.

There is no doubt that it reduces our chances. But we have to try not to be afraid of that failure. The way to avoid the fear of failure is to create your experience, patience, and the notion of failure is not bad.

Anyway, in Japan. I have had the experience of being pointed out every time.

I failed at something in several environments. And failure was considered a bad thing.
So, I think it is a very difficult task to remove the thorns that are deeply rooted in My heart and mind.

However, do deep breathing with an unconscious mind. Think about yourself what is your strength and importance.

I believe in my own potential. Accepting what I did before that was all I did with me and my possibility. And I am determined to keep on trying.

I believe that it is necessary to believe in myself.

In the beginning of the dance, I believe that fear of failure. I feel like I am getting used to it. And perseverance will increase our potential and help us develop the ability to handle difficult things.

First, we need to fundamentally rethink failure. And let it be input into our brains.

It doesn’t matter if you are not good at it. It is okay to fail. If you get angry at people because of your step is not good at, or if they hate you. It is all good.

Let it go your thought. If they make fun of you, it is okay, do not listen to them what they said to you. Because one day you will be able to do it. You know that. The trick is to keep your distance from those who make fun of you. Because it is very effective.

In fact, I have cut off all relations with people who are mounting me for doing so. Or who deny what I want to do out of the top of their heads. These people are never change to be an angel.

I think this is very important. It is not only to build relationships with people who only say nice things. But also to prevent people from thinking “I can’t do it”.

Things are never impossible. It is possible if you believe in the possibilities and do the research.

The same was true for reaching the moon. It is not impossible. Nothing is impossible.

It may be difficult at first, but it is not impossible.

That is why I know I can do it, no matter what people say.

Tell your brain that it is possible, and make in yourself an angel.

To make things possible, it is more necessary than anything else to have a dialogue with me, who is essentially your best ally.

Thank you for reading.

To related an article: Better comes to don’t live of the social value

I think everyone has felt the difficulty of socializing with others sometimes. Basically, I am loyal, independent. And other sides are selfish and stubborn.

My personality will make it difficult time to accept other people’s advice.

That is so, I feel bad because I cannot take advice from people.

Because I rarely accept advice given to me by others. For that I feel like I don’t have enough room in my heart to accept their opinions. Well, this is my personality. I have a lot of pride and it has something to do with it.

Maybe, when I think someone is right to tell me. But I need to have taken enough time with it. Or the thing is that at least I need to try it first. And eventually, I can accept their positive advice.

Because the person giving the advice does not accept it, especially if it is something that has not been tried and seen, because the advice itself is not accurate.

However, I have a hard time accepting negative advice from anyone.

For example, I decided on new things and purpose. And saying quit a job, go wandering abroad or change my career. I thought this could be a big change in my life. And I know there is always a risk to try new things. I talked about it to my friends and they gave me a negative answer.

Such as he or she advised me not to do that at all even though I’ve never tried it yet. Why they recommended it is not because he or she thinks about my career. It is worthwhile and that it is a waste of time.

Okay, another example here.

I told my friend about my experience of someone who was upset when I warned him or her who was cutting in line. When I told him about it, he said, “That’s because you’ve been licked.” And I was like, “what the hell?” I thought he would be my ally. But I received a negative attitude. And I never tell him something that I thought was a good thing I did in my life or anything.

When I think about my personality deeply, I need to take care of my condition.

I realized that I was uncomfortable with people who had negative opinions.

I was told by people that something I liked or wanted to do then they said that it was wrong. And try to change my opinion which something that they believed. Some people may take it as, “You don’t have to worry about that.” Fundamentally, I don’t think anyone likes to be denied your thoughts.

From my experiences, I once advised an employee. “If you do it that way, it won’t work.” I may have rejected her way of doing things. Because it didn’t work that way. At the time, I remember she cried because she couldn’t do it the same way I did and it wouldn’t work.

I thought my advice was a good thing for her, but it was also my ego.

It was like I wish she’s going to have better sales for her sake. But she didn’t want to be and It was just that I wanted to give advice to her. It is all my perspective that I want to be a good manager for her.

If she wanted to get a reference for my opinions, I should give her. But if I wanted to give it to her, that is controlling her. I learned that from my experience. That is if I think it will be a good thing for people to do what I think but sometimes it goes opposed.

Most of the people who give negative opinions and advice to others are not trying to make the other person feel good. They want to feel good about themselves to change and manipulate us instead.

They are trying to look good for their sake. It may be to defend their position. Even if we don’t notice sometimes that it is to force your own thoughts and feelings on the other person. After she cried, I thought what I did to her was very arrogant to say.

What the other person does not want is not good for them either. What we need to help them is take them so they should think for themselves.

And of course, it is one thing to warn someone about something they should not do. It is such as not keeping a promise or committing a criminal act.

Is it for them to reject your opinion and put your own opinion over theirs?

Something like people have entered your house without your permission. And they suddenly say that it is a horrible painting and deny a picture of your room which is your value. Because they want to tell their worth, and give a shit on you.

Is it really for the other person’s benefit to deny and try to correct things? When we deny someone, it is usually when we cannot accept things as they are.

And at the same time they are not satisfied with themselves. That is why saying something negative gives others a good feel.

I have come to think that what we really need to pay attention to is our own feelings toward the other person.

See things as it is and don’t deny it, let it be. Love shouldn’t hurt.

The same goes for work, friends, and relationships.

It is not real kindness or love to deny or correct someone.

You don’t have to force things to work out.

Just accept the person who they are and don’t control them by your ego. People just need to watch over him or her so that they can live his or her life in his or her own way. If they ask us to help, then we help them with our knowledge, love and forgiveness.

I think that is the best thing to do.

After you can follow this to not judge them at first point. You can really help them with your kids, your partner, your friends, and all of the people around you. It needs a patient.

You know we sometimes completely don’t notice what we give to someone’s feel harsh. I saw so many bad accidents to suicidal news because social network destroy them value and what they believed. Someone just doesn’t care what to say to people and they don’t take any responsibility for that.

Please note that under below the word:

• Perhaps my words or yours may make a person into a worthless person.
• Maybe my words or you may be making a person sad.
• probably my words or yours are killing people.

Words, no matter how small, can destroy self-esteem. We should be careful to use our words. Even if it is a good thing for your friends, it is maybe not for them sometimes. They don’t want to hear your advice or opinions.

We are all very sensitive and vulnerable.

Recently, I was asked a question about what it means not to judge people. My answer was about “not judging people based on what they have.” But now I changed and it was “not to deny people’s personality and accept all.”

We should protect our own hearts and thoughts. If we are not protecting at all, someone knows it and manipulated you. You probably need to consider the other person’s intention to not give your opinion in the first place. And you do not need to be forcibly grateful for them.

What you really need to be is what you really need to do is that don’t be distracted by things like, “I should be thankful,” or “I’ll be happy while I’m being told.

When you give advice to others, you need to help them when they ask for it without first thinking of yourself.

Whether at work or in love, you can enrich the people around you and your own heart by first understanding them and not imposing only your own opinion on them.

I hope this article will help your relationships, work environments, and love your kids.

Thank you for reading.

To related an article: Love is Knowing True Hearts with All Their Hearts